Norma: Excuse me? Ahem, excuse me?
Me: Yes, I see you sitting there by your bowl. The answer is no.
Norma: I don't think you understand. The bowl is empty. There is no food in this bowl.
Me: Right. You ate it all.
Norma: And now I would like some more food please. Meow.
Me: I'm not giving you any more food tonight.
Norma: But, meow.
Me: Remember how I said I thought you were getting fat? And then my mom came over and said she thought you were getting fat? And then my brother and sister-in-law came over and said that you're getting fat?
Norma: That's irrelevant. The point is, I'm hungry.
Me: I'm sorry about that. I shouldn't have been feeding you so much. But it's the New Year, and we're cutting back.
Norma: ... We?
Me: And by we, I mean you.
Norma: So, food?
Me: No more food tonight. Sorry, kitty. It's for your health. I wish you could understand.
Norma: Ok. Well, if I pee on your face while you're sleeping tonight, I hope you understand.